daily.TheOpie

My dad is still stuck in the ’90s when it comes to forwarding emails. I get a constant barrage of stuff ranging from “You know your old when…”  to weak right-wing propaganda. It wasn’t so bad when they came to my Yahoo address which is mostly junk mail anyway, but somewhere along the line he got my gmail address, and that’s the one that’s pushed to the phone and constantly checked.

On average, I’d say I read 1 in 5, this one came today, it was one of the amusing ones.

[ via nevver]

wkstar:

OJ Simpson, 99 problems

“So you gotta think about OJ’s situation: $25,000 a month, another man drivin’ his car, fuckin’ his wife, in a house he’s still payin’ a mortgage on. Now, I’m not sayin’ he should have killed her…but I understand.” - Chris Rock

Peanut Butter.

Satan didn’t stop this one, but your use of Papyrus did.

…excerpt from a religious themed email that my father forwarded to me. He’s still stuck in 1999 with all of his email forwards, but at least he’s using the internet, god bless his old heart.

X-Mas Decorations.

The accompanying text from the email I got this picture from:

Well, there is good news and bad news about my Christmas decorations this year. Good news is that I truly out did myself this year with my Christmas decorations.  The bad news is that I had to take him down after 2 days. I had more people come screaming up to my house than ever.

Great stories. But two things made me take it down. First, the cops advised me that it would cause traffic accidents as they almost wrecked when they drove by. Second, a 55 year old lady grabbed the 75 pound ladder almost killed herself putting it against my house and didn’t realize it was fake until she climbed to the top (she was not happy). By the way, she was one of many people who attempted to do that. My yard couldn’t take it either. I have more than a few tire tracks where people literally drove up my yard.